Ok, this didn’t happen here in Hong Kong but it is just too funny not to share!

Those of you who understand some Mandarin Chinese will hear that the poor bride had just found out that her groom is gay when the lover turned up at the wedding to demand his lover back.

A ‘war-of-words’ and some attempted slapping ensues after which the suitor grabs his man and takes off.

Watch:

Like they say here in Hong Kong: “That was so fun!“

I’m often amazed (comically so) at some of the English language used here in Hong Kong.  (Afrikaans has a lekker word for using language: besig)

A former British colony (now called a Special Administrative Region or SAR of China), it seems that some of the oooold English used under British rule has remained.

At least in officialdom.

For example the word “shroff” of “shroff office” is still widely used in the SAR when referring to a kiosk where payment is to be made (like a parking garage).  The Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines the word “shroff” as a banker or money changer in the Far East.

No Dogging

I just picked up on this picture from fellow Saffa expat in Hong Kong Monique Tenderini, after seeing it online some time ago:

Again, ‘dogging‘ seems to be a British slang meaning anything ‘related to voyeurism, exhibitionism or public displays of sexual behaviour’ according to WikiPedia.

In Cape Town we just called it ‘Parking!”

(We won’t ask Monique where she took this picture! Additional picture however was taken in Clearwater Bay by Hongkie Town )

I get quite irritated when I hear, on radio talk-shows back home, people talking about so-called “Fong Kong” products.

“Fong Kong” is a term adopted in South Africa to describe cheap, often sub-standard product made in China.

I don’t deny that, being the factory to the world, there are a lot of crap produced IN SOUTHERN CHINA and not Hong Kong, so I’m not sure why Hong Kong has to cop it.

That is why, while scrunching up today’s South China Morning Post for the refuse bin, a story, partly titled “Made in China” caught my eye.

I un-scrunched it and here it is:

Seems that a Guangdong-based company is trying to cash in on the Royal Wedding between Prince William and Kate Middleton by producing their own souvenir to mark the occasion.

Only…

They have the wrong groom on the mug.

Talk about a right royal screw-up!!

(Source: South China Morning Post/SCMP)

In Hong Kong, time is money. 

Everything is done fast. 

Especially when you’re doing roadworks in a busy city.

The iconic Tram clatters across Hong Kong Island everyday, almost all day, so if you’re going to do some maintenance on it’s tracks, you better do it fast. 

And use quick-setting concrete.

Just keep silly Audi-drivers away.

Epic fail!

One can probably compile a thick coffee-table book on the bizarre signage to be found around Hong Kong.  I could probably put together a project to do an online version of such a publication, but there are already so many floating around on the internet so why bother?!

Here are some of the weird and wonderful signs and shop names fans posted on a FaceBook Group recently:

Happy Hour for the patrons, Sad Hour for the proprietor!

                                                                Adult Shop? Who cares… satisfaction is guaranteed.

De-flowered fanny?

                                                                               A shop for wankers.

                                                             OK, I’m am old-skool so this… is just wrong on so many levels!

If you scroll down to the bottom of this page, you’ll notice that we have added a second YouTube video box.  There are so many creative clips coming out of Hong Kong these days that we thought we’d add one more player to add to your obvious delight.

You will notice as well that, ironically both clips currently displayed are about the story of the Hip Hop Hop Hing Meat Company, a gang of talented Hong Kong rugby players who succumbed to the pressure of the fans and finally released their debut single, exclusively on YouTube called: I’m on a tram.

Our sister-site BlitzBokke.com recently did an Asian exclusive (sort -of) of the hit song.

The producers of the video, in their usual crawls around the attics of the WanChai night-spots, came across some lost, previously unseen footage that led to the making of this hit single.

Herewith, ladies and gentlemen (and all ye lady-boys of King’s Park), a glimpse of how I’m on a tram came to pass:

Living in a bustling city such as Hong Kong can be a stressful experience.

For others more so.  There is no doubt that the suicide rate in the SAR is very high.

Not a week goes by when there isn’t a media report of a suicide or an attempted-suicide in Hong Kong or nearby Guandong Province (Mainland China).

I just picked up on this video of vacuum-cleaner manufacturer Electrolux‘s spoof of a “Hong Kong suicide”

I would have found it funny if it wasn’t such a serious issue on this side of the noodle-curtain.

(Cheers for the heads up, Susan in Abu Dhabi)

Hongkongers can sometimes get rather “emotional” about small non-issues.

In recent months, there have been several incidents that have captured the local imagination, so much so that somebody even set up a website dedicated to the now infamous “Bus Uncle.”

Just to give you some perspective: HongKongers, especially the older folk, sometimes speak on their mobile phones as if they’re the only ones around. LOUD, and often on public transport.  The Bus Uncle did so on a bus and was asked by a youngster to tone it down.

Talking about incidents, you may have seen the viral YouTube clip about the woman who throws this moerse tantrum after missing her flight (6,442,730 views):

Then of course, there’s (yet another woman) going into a fit when told there’s no sharkfin soup available (1,169,777 views):

I think the latest “video star” created on YouTube is the now famous Bus Uncle video clip (1,034,411 views):

(Do read the sub-titles… they’re hilarious!)

However, I just picked up on the following “MTR uncle” trying to mouth off to a gweilo (foreigner) on the MTR train line.  It is not clear what led up to this incident, but the clip shows the foreigner briefly fiddling with the uncle’s bag.  The altercation escalates when the uncle touches the foreigner’s face.

Watch the uncle narrowly escaping being thoroughly bliksem-ed by clicking here

(Cheers to The Dark Side for the heads up)

No Money, No Honey!

No, this post is not about the brisk “trading” that happens in Wan Chai every evening, but about a Monkok stall that sells Hong Kong souvenirs.

I took this picture some time ago:

Can you find these classics:

* Let’s hug it out, Bitch!

* Energy saving testing day. No working, No school, No homework

* Don’t ask for cigarettes

* Beer can give energy

* No Beer, No Dad

With all these arrests for taking up-skirt pictures* in Hong Kong, one has to be very careful when taking pictures of interesting people, especially on the MTR.

With Hong Kong being such an international destination, I always try to travel around the city with at least one camera because there are just so many interesting people (local and tourists) around.

I caught this local Aunty on my camera somewhere between Admiralty and Shek Kip Mei on the (Dark Blue) MTR Island Line .  It must have been a sweltering 33 degrees outside, but here she was, all decked out in her Sunday-finest complete with a pair of pink toe-socks:

Tickle me pink! (Pic: Mike Jansen)

* The local papers regularly report of arrests that are made of sexual predators taking pictures up women’s skirts at places like the city’s many escalators and on the often packed MTR train system.